Consecrated to the Heart of the Redeemer under the patronage of the Theotokos and Fr. Gerard Manley Hopkins, S.J.
Showing posts with label mental health. Show all posts
Showing posts with label mental health. Show all posts

25 May 2020

"Lest We Forget"; Of Michael Christopher and Christopher Michael

My latest Coronatide Consideration comes at the cusp of transition time, when the five counties in our diocese act in consort with civil authorities in permitting public Masses, albeit with still-appropriate safety precautions. The Gospel (Jn 16:29-33) packs the punch, which our deacon delivered deftly. As for my follow-up, I cannot say much, except everyone was left standing.


Jesus' disciples claimed to appreciate His long-awaited clarity, though He never meant to be murky to them. In fact, the Lord observed, they still won't get it, "for had they known it, they would never have crucified the Lord of glory" (1 Cor 2:8); they would never have done their part by abandoning Him at the moment of truth.

"Speaking plainly, with no more figures of speech"! I wonder where that would leave me, or any other poetically-plumed penman. Penmen of note like John McCrae of In Flanders' Fields fame, Recessional's Rudyard Kipling, or my man Hopkins' not-quite-titled "The Soldier," which starts with "YES."--fittingly expressing the consent of every redcoat and tar to their service.

In our day, to that last point, I would add "whitecoat" and "whitecap" to include nurses, doctors, and everyone in the way of this hidden harm, COVID-19. Many fallen heroes among them, too.

YES. Where would our world be without its poets? Some soldiers and patriots might opine poets' oft-controversial positions are posturings, virtue-signals, plain nonsense at best or subversive at worst. Casting things in a different light was never out of season, except in countries that weren't free.

The freedom in which we celebrated the Mass this morning was in some sense never withheld from us, although most bishops and priests considered it best to contain folks as much to their homes as possible, given how close quarters like churches can be flash-points for the sickness.

Today's open-air method is among the options when things officially open on 1 June. By then we will have an FM transmitter to spread the Word. (This morning I learned the transmitter is supposed to be coming tomorrow! Oh, to have been a little quicker to the draw when in other purchases a slower draw might have helped.)

Mass is at once a sacrifice, a banquet, and a memorial. The "Mystery of Faith" acclamation is ingredient to that part of the canon called Anamnesis (Gk, not-forgetting), according to Jesus' command to "do this"--take, break, bless, give, eat, and drink--"in remembrance of Me." Be with us yet, lest we forget, and do we!

Just as Memorial Day exhorts us not to forget the men and women "who more than self their country loved, / and mercy more than life," so every day's Memorial Offering mystically transports us to that moment of supreme truth, goodness, and beauty, the mountain of mercy that lends meaning to every sacrificial offering, large and small.

Please God, these days will remind us of the constant need for remembrance, in the Biblical sense that God remembers: acting concretely on behalf of the one in question.

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Sarah Coleman, top row, second from left; Helenann Welker, bottom row, last at right

My late mother was the best friend of Sally Coleman since high school and nursing school days. They both went on to be faithful and caring wives, mothers, and Licensed Practical Nurses.

They were so close, and so closely pregnant, that they made a kind of pact to name their children together. The first one to emerge was Michael Christopher Wargo (sharing her husband's first name); the second, a few months later, was Christopher Michael Zelonis (a name Mom had in mind and heart for years).

These two boys were in each other's company only a handful of times over the years, as their families' lives went on, fortunately enjoying periodic episodes of quality and quantity. This was much the case in the last fifteen years, after my Dad died in 2004. Mom had become an occasional beach bum in the Wargo pool. Many laughs and reminiscences shared, including a June 1977 birthday party of Michael when the two of us were in the same playpen--photo to follow. I met him as if for the first time at another party, years later.

Mom accompanied the Wargo family in moments delightful and difficult, especially when Michael, who had served his country nobly, took his own life on 20 May 2013, after an arduous struggle with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, which had taken a few family tolls prior to that day. As they do, every survivor was left holding the proverbial bag, mourning and speculating.

Many and varied are the battles of the "War at Home," as it has been termed, where servicemen and women still fall, often despite the best efforts of those around them--often amid a certain unawareness of those around them, or within themselves.

Mr. and Mrs. Wargo have since given their lives to foster mental health awareness and care for our veterans. They further honor their son's memory by volunteering for the "Valor Clinic" and "Mission 22," which has honored veteran victims of PTSD with steel silhouettes, including Michael's near the trailhead in his native Lehighton. I pass and pray often, while on the run. The templates of these soldiers are scheduled ("virus-permitting," Sally says) to repose permanently--appropriately, by name--in Broken Arrow, Oklahoma, come October, having made a tour of duty in several spots.




Learning that my latest assignment would be in Lehighton was a joy, especially knowing the Wargos all my life, and even Sally's parents George and Margaret Coleman, who tolerated the precocious five-year-old who hung around George's typewriter stand at "the Auction" (the Hometown Farmer's Market). Margaret thought enough of me to buy me a religious item of my choosing at the one Catholic goods stand. I chose a crucifix, which I still have. God bless her, she still thinks of me so, with sharpest mind, in her 90s.

It was never far away: at my desk. St. Anthony has come through for me on lesser things with greater effort.
The pastoral delicacy surrounding self-wrought deaths is something that alas, not all priests, have exercised. I wonder sometimes, when it comes to any commendation in circumstances perhaps awkward, shameful, or volatile, how we do it. A Power Greater, no doubt, even when (only God knows why) that Power seemed utterly inaccessible to them, or they felt utterly unworthy of His regard--which in fact could never have been stronger, at any point.

Lord God of Hosts (armies), be with us yet, even when, for that final moment, we forget.

06 May 2014

Drama and Reality

Soon after Stephen and his associates were appointed to the diaconate in Acts 6, Stephen got into trouble--"made a mess," as Pope Francis is fond of saying. Stephen was only speaking the Truth, but people who weren't fond of the Truth started engaging him in debate. His opponents had no success, because they couldn't match his insights and because they did not share in the gift of the [Holy] Spirit as Stephen did.

The persecutors were not open to hearing the Truth from Stephen. They reacted very strongly to his words, and could not bear his angelic, that is, peaceful appearance (cf. Acts 6:15). The story reminds me of what a seminary professor once said: Non-virtuous people are uncomfortable in, often repulsed by, the presence of virtue.

Saint Luke, author of the Acts of the Apostles, said that Stephen's opponents 'instigated" people to make exaggerated and downright false accusations against him. Stephen allegedly was predicting that Jesus would destroy the Temple and change Jewish customs. We know that the Temple eventually would fall to the Romans. That destruction itself changed many of the customs and regulations, especially pertaining to ritual sacrifice. As for dietary laws, the Jews remained bound to observe them, but Christians soon would be exonerated from most of them (cf. Acts 15:22-29).

Let's consider for a moment the concept of "instigation." As a fan of the dictionary, I go there first. The Latin verb instigare comes from in (toward) + stigare (to prick, incite). We can therefore say that Stephen's debaters were...inciters. Modesty forbids use of the other word, though it seems delightfully apt.

I submit that Stephen's instigators depicted the modern use of the term drama and its corresponding adjective, dramatic. According to a contributor at urbandictionary.com (a site I would not otherwise cite in print), the word is used to describe people who seem to experience and share an inordinate number of personal problems, and who react to everyday matters with intense and shifting emotions. The accuracy of dramatic perceptions doesn't tend to be reliable. Dramatic behavior can be attributed to boredom and a desire for attention.

Within the definition cited above, one can find related words that unfortunately include "crazy," "fake," "high school," and, strange to see, "Facebook." As for Facebook and other social networking sites, I believe they can be used to sow truth, goodness, beauty, and humor as much as their opposites. As always, their use will be determined by their users.

The reality of mental illness has rightly merited a more compassionate regard in recent years. Indeed, a number of the characteristics of "drama" can be identified with borderline personality disorder. Through an honest self-appraisal, however, everyone might discover within themselves a degree of emotional or spiritual sickness, manifested in various "attachments" or addictions that compromise their understanding and freedom. There is no room, therefore, for labeling people. It serves only to distance them from us and make us feel superior to them. Don't we all have a share in the Cross of Christ, so often identifiable with our own faults and weaknesses?

It always has been my interest to help people to grow in responsibility for their decisions, and to accept help for the same in my own life. While illness may make certain ingrained attitudes or behaviors easier to adopt or harder to shake, if we want to be well (Jn 5:2) we must pay close attention to our mental and emotional responses as they occur. It takes time and patience with ourselves, and with others whom we help along the way.

We don't want to excuse the persecutors of the early Church on the basis of a supposed personality disorder. After all, Stephen's persecutors were closed to the knowledge of Reality. Even though our openness may seem minimal some days, we want to govern our thoughts, words, and actions, as well as understand our motives, according to the Truth. This lifelong process requires us to look beyond our limited perceptions. To become "well" is to become honest, responsible, and free. As we seek self-governance with the aid of the Lord's Word, the Sacraments, our daily prayers and sacrifices, the adoption of these disciplines will help us to grow in compassion for others.